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Who Can Put On the Best Play?

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Who Can Put On the Best Play?
Rules
None.
Winner
Kenny
Humiliation
Spenny reads the Gettysburg Address dressed as Abraham Lincoln while Kenny sits on his head, an enormous top hat painted from his buttocks to his shoulder blades.
Original airdate
February 12, 2010

Who Can Put On the Best Play? is the twelfth episode of the sixth season.  Kenny and Spenny must both come up with a script, characters, and setting and act it out onstage for a talent agent. Whomever she decides put on the better play is the winner.


The CompetitionEdit

Kenny and Spenny have opposite opinions of the theatre: Kenny has complete and utter disdain for the medium, while Spenny fosters a passion for it. In his office, Spenny reveals he'd already written a play on his own for fun years ago, called Louis et Marie, Une Tragedie, featuring the characters of Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette during the French Revolution, which he wants to adapt. He shows faith in his creation, calling it "solid gold". Meanwhile, in his room, Kenny and his crew show off their own acting talent, ranging from the impressive to the not so much. Once they finish up with the antics, Kenny decides to get serious.

Spenny has a billboard and presentation ready in his office, apparently to give a lecture to the audience about the 3 Estates during the French Revolution, but instead sings it to a hip-hop beat. In the basement, Kenny surprises his crew by entering in a white full-body foam suit with an enlarged head, the package for which he claims was labeled "Theatre Art". He proceeds to ride a bike with a television strapped to the front in circles while white sheets of paper are rotated around a clothes line featuring the words motor, smoke, burlap, refuse, etc., ?. After his presentation, Kenny shows concern that Spenny has the advantage by having a completed script and passion for theatre. 

Kenny continues to experiment with ideas, donning his Goldar costume and dancing around on the balcony whilst making noise with dryer hose, trash cans, aluminum sheets, copper rods and rubber bins, all of which are painted gold. Quickly exhausted, Kenny abandons the idea. Spenny, meanwhile, has gone to a Factory Theatre, where he the other actors of his play are gathered, along with an acting coach. While rehearsing the play, the acting coach, Peter, is flustered by Spenny's attempts at emulating a French accent and walk. 

Kenny has dressed up as a raccoon and gone back out on the balcony to sing a song of his creation. Once he returns inside, Kenny complains that people are willing to see plays similar to the once he's just performed. Back at the Factory Theatre, Peter has pointed out that Spenny's play is too long, and suggests cutting down on dialogue. Things get heated when Spenny refuses to change his play and raises his voice, prompting Peter to leave the studio. 

Grasping for more play ideas, Kenny brings his crew out at night. Kenny plays a Vietnam War veteran wandering the streets when he comes across his old friend Joey (played by the audience), who supposedly died in the war. The veteran then refuses to believe Joey is standing in front of him, and laments the loss of his old friend. 

It's time for the plays to begin, and Spenny is so nervous that he forgets his lines backstage while he is having makeup put on. The judge, Amanda Rosenthal, a talent agent, and takes her seat in front of the stage. The curtains are pulled away, and despite Spenny's horrible French accent, the play looks promising. Spenny has a free moment while his other actors perform a scene without Spenny's character, and Spenny tells the camera that he's caught the theatre bug, and has suddenly remembered all his lines. He promptly forgets his line in one of the next scenes. Amanda is shown getting more and more bored throughout the play, which runs in excess of ten acts. By act 14, she's taken to amusing herself on her cell phone until the play ends.

It's Kenny's turn to perform his play, which he's called Things Are Looking Up! (The Truth Behind the Holocaust, 9/11, Genetic Farming, and Some of That Other Stuff...). His play isn't taking place in a theatre, and so Amanda meets him outside a different building, where Kenny greets her in character. He's playing a fiddle (badly) and speaks in a Yiddish accent. Kenny's crew instruct her to follow Kenny around the building while Kenny acts out his play, which tells the story of a Jewish man whose wife cheated on him gets sent to a concentration camp, where he thrives. When he's instructed to clean up the bodies of other prisoners, he finds the bodies of his wife and her lover. The play ends as he swims across the ocean to America as he sings its national anthem. 

It's time for the judging, and Amanda deems both productions to be a mockery of theatre. She liked Spenny's actors and costumes, but was turned off by his horrible accent and the play's running time. From Kenny's play, she enjoyed that while he made an extremely offensive play, he did so knowingly and didn't take himself seriously. In the end, she chooses Kenny's play over Spenny's. 

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